Poop, Pizza, & Snow

I am really tired.

My little brother stayed over this weekend. We watched gory movies and had pizza and beer, and then he witnessed "Friday fun nights at Mari's house"... as my middle son woke and I had to help him birth a constipated turd at 3 A.M.

Potty training has him holding his shit in. Which means he holds it in because he has no desire in sitting on a potty. He stopped shitting on my floor but now he is not shitting at all. So he gets kinda backed up. Especially with eating lots o' Easter chocolates.

Last night he had to birth it. I had to help him. I had to tell him to ease it out and to put his legs way back. My brother sat motionless in my recliner. Eyes wide open. Scared.

When I got my bouncing five pound turdish grandson out... my baby got up. At 4 A.M. And he wanted to PLAY! YAY! WEEE!

It went something like this:
Me: go night night bubba
Baby: Buuu-bahhhh (I think he said either bubba or baba or just baby jibberish, you be the judge)
Me: Here is baba, you want baba?
Baby: ::::blows raspberries at bottle then pitches it::::
Me: Pleeeease go night night
Baby: Buuuu-baaahhhh. Ahhh la la la ::::smiles::::
My Brother: :::sitting motionless in my recliner::::

This went on until almost 5 A.M.

I woke up this morning and my kids had helped themselves to hot dogs, chips, chocolate and a botched attempt at making Kool Aid. And they were playing an acoustic version of the Sesame Street Theme song, with my daughter's guitar- in my brother's ear as he tried to sleep on my couch.

I whisked him quickly to the boy's room, so he could get some sleep and so he wouldn't go into shock.

"Mommy, look! SNOW!" They said.

It's still snowing. Spring is fucking with me.

And I think my poor little brother may never have the desire to procreate. Ever.